eHarmony Review

Well, I counted back and yes, Lola has been engaged three times. Only two of them were truly psycho. The other one I've always thought was misguided but nice. This blog is also drawing us closer together because I did not know she had this freakish superstition about horoscopes.

Because I care about information, I think my posts will be mostly informative (as in, if I had drama I would happily share it but since I have none I will give people useful information).

Last summer my mother mentioned - just a few times - that she thought I should give eHarmony a try. Because, yes, I am still totally under my mother's control I succumbed and signed up back in September 2007.

For those of you who are not familiar with eHarmony, they make you take a personality test, whose credibility I keep questioning because they labeled me as an extrovert. You are sent pictures and profiles of men that are supposed to match you and then their system provides "guided communication" to help you filter and figure out if your values are a match. Their matching system sent me various men, most of which lived in Utah. None particularly caught my eye other than this adorably geeky looking guy in Idaho who discontinued our beginning online communications because he found someone real to date.

Some of these men were disturbing, like the man who talked about how all he wanted was to fall asleep in the arms of the beautiful woman he passionately loves every night. Sorry, but her arms? Isn't it supposed to work the other way, or is that just gender bias? Others were simply no good, like the guy who asked if I liked to be crazy and spontaneous and do dangerous things, or if I was more the type who thinks people who deliberately put themselves into dangerous situations are stupid. I took option B, and so it ended.

The breaking point came when in one week they sent me the profiles of:

• A man 7 inches shorter than me. I happen to be tall, and I refuse to provide a Mutt-and-Jeff visual joke for the public for the rest of my life.
• A man with 7 kids living with his ex-wife down the street who clearly wasn't making enough money to support everyone involved, based on his job, so - no. I am not marrying someone to provide him with the financial resources to support his kids and ex-wife in their house down the street.
• A man who said that the last book he read was Henry James' "Washington Square". He said after he finished it he was up all night crying about it. Enough said.
• One that looked normal, except that he's Finnish and living in Finland. But I got his "can't stands/ must haves" and he mentioned in three places that he cares about how his wife looks - she cannot be overweight. So then I realized he is really just a lightweight that somehow got past my radar. Plus he said he can't be with someone who worries, and we all know I am a worrier, so that one was a no-go too.

Conclusions about eHarmony? No good for LDS people. They said they are filtering for compatability, but I think they matched me up with every LDS guy in their system (because we match on no drinking, no smoking, no sex, no gambling....). I say that I am looking for just some nice guy that's active in the church but when you get someone who says he's an actor slash massage therapist living in L.A., you know you have to run the other way. You didn't stay single all these years just to wind up playing nursemaid, did you? ....Well, I didn't.

In another post I'll give my review of ldslinkup (I need time to compose just the right descriptive terms), but I'll give you the spoiler here: I think that the General Authorities are right and we should be looking in our wards and stakes. Of course, my stake at the time had no single men between 30 and 40, but that's another post too.